BARBARA'S TCHATZKAHS

This is no surprise to me. Any group that constantly bloviates on about ethics, correctness (some of them in the religious sense by quoting scripture to you...) and how awful anyone who isn't them... always seems to do so to hide the 800-pound gorilla standing right behind them. Hi there, Mr. Gorilla! I've seen you for a while now. And Mr. Gorilla - zip it up. Americans may paint themselves in increasingly bright shades of red and blue, but new research finds one thing that varies little across the nation: the liking for online pornography. A new nationwide study of anonymised credit-card receipts from a major online adult entertainment provider finds little variation in consumption between states. "When it comes to adult entertainment, it seems people are more the same than different," says Benjamin Edelman at Harvard Business School. However, there are some trends to be seen in the data. Those states that do consume the most porn tend to be more conser

JUDAISM & ABUSE: EXPECTING BETTER This was written a few years back. Despite strides in educating leading rabbinic authorities it seems that nothing much has changed… not yet. Some are truly working on the problem and I beg them to keep working on it. Sometimes preserving a marriage AT ALL COSTS or allowing a manipulative man to make a woman an AGUNAH and then looking the other way - is NOT the way to go. Allowing the verbal & emotional abuse of children in the name of Torah and keeping it hush-hush for appearances is enabling the abuse! Loshen Hara can be a mitzvah if it stops an abuser from taking advantage of his family, his friends and the world at large. If You Beat Him He Will Not Die by Richard Silverstein A personal and theological meditation on child abuse As spiritual communities, it is enormously important that we provide grief work as part of the process of healing [from the effects of abuse]. At the same time, we have to take that lesson of choosing to

I had just dropped my children at pre-K. It was early so I decided to drive over to the grocery and pick up a few things for dinner. I was still living in Astoria, New York. My cell phone rang, a friend asked me frantically, "Barbara, where's your husband?" I answered "he's at work." She said "doesn't he work near the Trade Center?" "Yes," I said, "across the street." "My God, Barbara don't you know ?" (PAUSE) "Turn on your radio!" I hung up, turned on my car radio and heard what sounded like an elaborate joke. People talking about terrorists, a plane accident downtown. I froze. My cell rang again. It was my then-husband, "someone just flew into the Trade Center with a plane. Looks like an accident. Just want you to know I am fine." "O.K." I said, "thank goodness." My husband told me later that he literally was putting his phone back in the cradle when