BARBARA'S TCHATZKAHS

Tiger, please go join Jon Gosselin, Steve Philips and all the other cheating Narcissist Morons hiding behind “sex addiction rehab.” We all know you’re going to go back to preying on vulnerable women and then allowing your media hacks to call them skanks & bimbos as soon as you can. Boo-friggin’ hoo... get over yourself. How to Not Apologize When You’ve Seriously F-d Up ( a good read just for you Tiger, baby) excerpts : Make sure the “confession”, er, apology comes MONTHS or years after the incident. It’s just too much work to actually own up immediately afterwards. Let’s face it, you’re not after any real resolution, and you are not offering any kind of restitution – you are looking to assuage your guilty conscience and buy absolution, and, if you play your cards right, you can get attention for your act of “bravery” in coming forward. If it’s absolution you are looking for, why not join the Catholic church instead? “Powerful and sneaky people use apologies as end runs around repen...

A couple of gems from Kathy Krajc o (with some equal opportunity graphics for you as well): "Responsibility" Wrap: Narcissist Hurts You to Make YOU Guilty of the Sin of Feeling the Pain by Kathy Krajco Remember when you were a child and you used to say that "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"? Even little children instinctively know enough to hide their pain when someone has hurt their feelings. This instinct is good, even when the enemy isn't really an enemy - just a friendly opponent in a tennis match. Don't let the emotional effect on you of bad things show. It encourages the adversary. But keeping them to yourself doesn't get rid of those feelings, does it? Children, however, live in very different minds than normal adults do. Like Alice and Peter Pan, they don't distinguish between fantasy and realty, preferring fantasy, where they learn the (delusory) power of magical thinking. In some cases this pretending goe...

It always amuses me is when a pathological person gets into court and tries to "sell" their twisted version of reality to a judge and ultimately gets called on it. Oh, the sicko NEVER admit they were wrong but it's heartening to see that some judges do not buy their lies. It's also validating because so many pathologicals make their victims crazy and push them over the edge by insisting it "never happened" or they "never said/ did that" or "it's them not me." The reasoning behind this one is beyond laughable. It's even sadder when these guys hide behind religion. (Any religion) HASIDIC 'RAPIST' FIT FOR TRIAL Shrinks aren't buying a 23-year-old Hasid's claim that he can't assist in his defense against charges of rape and child pornography because he's too devout to look at the photographic evidence. David Silverman, of Rockland County, has been found mentally fit to proceed on charges that he and two budd...

THE FALLEN MIGHTY Why is it that the most self-righteous or homophobic or religious and/or outwardly Puritanical politicians (on either side of the aisle) always end up in some horrible scandal? Like David Vitter, Mark Foley, Bob Allen and now - Senator Craig's bathroom hijinks. It follows that the people I have known who make the most noise: "I would NEVER see a hooker!" or "I am not gay" (just two of the various comments I've heard over the years from hypocrites) are seeing high end hookers, having gay sex on their lunch hours or after work. And it seems the more extreme they are in their beliefs, the more pervy they are in real life. What the heck? Do these guys really think just SAYING it will help them cope? Or that we are that blind & stupid? If you're gay, so what - be gay and move on to the issues. And stop with the "my wife & I have moved on" crap. Vitter's wife said prior to this she'd cut his 'family jewe...

WHAT FALLS AWAY During the last few weeks of travelling with my children I had some wonderful opportunities to educate them, show them America, re-acquaint them with family and meet some other great people working to end abuse here and in other countries while brainstorming about pro-active approaches to making that happen. One of them gave me a copy of Mia Farrow's book WHAT FALLS AWAY . I have a lifelong habit of reading a little before I go to bed so I thanked this person and accepted the book. It was published in 1997 and wasn't something I would have chosen myself but I am very glad I read it. It has been on my mind ever since. Let me say as an advocate to end abuse & domestic violence, a lot about Farrow's book rang true. Her deep love for Frank Sinatra, who was unfortunately controlling and mercurial, her intellectual love for Andre Previn - with whom she had twins - and the marriage ended when each of their jobs just kept them apart too much. And of course,...

BLAMING THE VICTIM IS SHAMEFUL I can't stand injustice. I never could. I got myself in trouble repeatedly at school for telling the truth and not knowing when to keep my mouth shut. My father, of blessed memory, had this same problem. He ended up as a Lieutenant with the Sheriff's Department where he lived. Me? I just vent about it on this blog... (and in therapy). When I worked as a paralegal there were times I had to go to court to file papers or get the clerk for a particular judge to sign off on them. I got to sit through some proceedings or parts of them that really disgusted me. But this one in the news recently is particularly heinous. Since learning about Destructive Narcissism and Sociopathy and now working with Domestic Violence victims, who, like me, were victimized by people like this - certain trials have fascinated me. O.J. was interesting but obvious after all was said and done. The BTK Killer was good. Scott Peterson was personally riveting because he w...