BARBARA'S TCHATZKAHS

from WONKETTE: Former Republican Missouri House Speaker Beats Up, Chokes Mistress During Sex In an incident in which the perpetrator should have considered that he would become a household name on Wonkette before going through with it, former Missouri House Speaker Rod Jetton is facing assault charges for allegedly beating the shit out of his mistress while having sex. His ladyfriend had not uttered the “safe word,” probably because Jetton was beating her unconscious. The Scott County court clerk confirms a felony complaint has been filed against former Missouri House Speaker Rod Jetton for an incident that allegedly took place Nov. 15 in Sikeston, Mo. [...] The complaint alleges Jetton “recklessly caused serious physical injury to ——- by hitting her on the head, and choking her resulting in unconsciousness and the loss of the function of part of her body.” UPDATE, 3:50: The affidavit attached to the probably cause statement alleges Jetton went to the home of the victim No...

This week, the following column by Andrea Peyser appeared in the NEW YORK POST : Crazy couple's a kick, if they don't kill each other By ANDREA PEYSER These crazy kids just can't keep their hands off each other. Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook. The white- tooth glamazons go together, like Botox and hair weaves. A year after I thought we'd seen the last of the aging, controlling sex addict and the aging, controlling supermodel who divorced him, the Cook-Brinkleys, I'm afraid, have become a nagging social disease. They're not done yet. "He'd do anything he can to harm Christie's reputation and somehow suggest he isn't the scumbag pervert he's been painted to be," lawyer Joseph Quatela, of Christie's legal team, told me after the pair signed off on Part II of their divorce. "Peter Cook believes she is so angry with him and that her hatred for him will exceed her love for her children," responded Cook lawyer Steven Kuhn. And ...

I know that some of my Orthodox friends are going to call or write me now and tell me I don't understand. Maybe I don't. But I do know what abuse is. So was the husband mentioned below abusing his wife because of her infertility? Abuse and marital problems are big issues when there's infertility. Infertility can cause severe depression, acting out and other serious problems in the woman. So because she wasn't breeding it was o.k. to treat her poorly? And not giving a woman a Get. Making an Agunah out of a woman. Talk about misogyny and control. These are things I don't think I want to understand. By ANDREA PEYSER AND you thought you had trouble committing. Thirty years after divorce became all the rage in America, the pastime is catching on like wildfire in the kid-rich, ultra-Orthodox Jewish community, where getting a "get" is the new black. So says psychologist Daniel Schonbuch, who thinks divorces (known in the community as "gets") are th...

A Relationship in Numbers As some of you who have read previous posts may know, I have been thinking a lot about numbers and statistics lately — what they mean, how they define us, and, more importantly, how they fail to capture what cannot be so easily quantified. In digging through research for my book proposal, I unwittingly came across the following statistic: The divorce rate in marriages where chronic illness is present is over 75 percent. (see http://www.mychronicillness.com/invisibleillness/statistics.htm. ) Now, I am not here to debate the accuracy of these statistics or discuss the methodology behind them, but they did make me stop and think. I was told recently I had a 75 percent chance of not having children on my own, so I approached this statistic with the same question: How do you know if you’ll be in that lucky 25 percent? Seventy-five percent of marriages where chronic illness is present do not last. That is an overwhelming number to me, and it might be misleading. Peo...

THE AGUNAH AND A SUMMARY OF POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS Rabbi Dr. Yitzchak Breitowitz The problem of the agunah -- the "chained" or "anchored" wife -- is a serious one, though it is not as prevalent as many Jewish feminists maintain. The term "agunah" appears in the Talmud primarily in connection with a husband who disappeared or was missing in action. While such agunot (plural of agunah) certainly exist in this day and age as well (consider the Holocaust or the Israeli soldiers who are MIA's), the primary use of the term today refers to a woman who cannot obtain a religious divorce (a "get") even after her marriage has been civilly terminated and hence is prohibited from marrying others. Husbands sometimes withhold such a divorce out of malice or spite or an attempt to extort money or concessions in the areas of child support, custody, visitation, or marital property. Whatever the reason, the withholding of a "get" can be a source of great ...

Not just stupid, "needy" women get taken in by these guys . They are so pervasive -- they take in USUALLY the BEST OF US!! Good for you Christie for keeping it public and letting people know these creeps are out there among us all... and don't worry about what Cook or any of his buddies say about you. You do what's best for your kids! (excerpt:) Christie Brinkley Divorce: Shrink Says Cook’s Brain Is All Weird by Stuart Heritage If you were the judge in the Christie Brinkley divorce, who would you give custody of the children to? You’ve got two choices - there’s Christie Brinkley, the former supermodel who looks like she spends her weekends baking cooking and making fresh lemonade; and then there’s Peter Cook, a man who pays thousands of dollars each month to waggle his pee-pee around on the internet. You’d probably wait for professional psychiatric advice before making a decision, wouldn’t you? Well, fear not - a psychiatrist has taken the stand at the Christie Br...

By Wency Leung An ex-husband is challenging a Canadian Supreme Court judgment that has been heralded as a major boost in the global cause for Jewish women's stronger religious divorce rights. The woman in the case doesn't think he has a chance. After nearly two decades of legal battles over her right to a religious divorce, Stephanie Bruker, 59, thought she'd finally settled a case that has been heralded as a breakthrough for other observant Jewish women who have become "agunah," or "chained," and unable to remarry after seeking a divorce. In December, in a landmark ruling for the intersection of civil and religious law, the Supreme Court of Canada ordered Bruker's ex-husband to pay $47,500 in damages for the years he denied giving her a religious divorce, called a "get," after swearing to do so as part of a civil divorce agreement. But in a last-ditch effort, Bruker's ex-husband is asking the Supreme Court to rehear the case, according...

There Are Some Who Don’t Say Sorry I read this story and thought, "wow - I could have written this myself! " It's always powerful to read the inner thoughts of others in emotionally & verbally abusive relationships. The loneliness and emptiness of being in this sort of relationship is soul crushing. And as this piece below says, ' you don't recognize yourself. ' In counseling, I have met at least 25 women who all say the same things, in essence 'I didn't know what I was doing when I was with him. I can't believe I did those things. I was so brainwashed. It just wasn't like me to behave like that.' No, I believe it - I have been there. Bruises, blood, marks - are easy to see. But the pain inside is invisible... and I can tell you unless your abuser makes REAL & GENUINE amends - you can't heal, you can't move on and it never, ever heals. You adapt, your pain & anger empower you in some ways - but only the abuser ...

"GRIEVOUS WRONG" AMENDED AGAINST AGUNOT Knesset Committee: Division of property before divorce by Neta Sela Constitution, Law and Justice Committee approves bill preventing husbands from extorting wives seeking divorce. MK Melchior: There are no halachic issues here Could it be the end of divorce extortion? The Knesset’s Constitution, Law and Justice Committee approved this week an amendment to Israeli law that would prevent ‘divorce-refusing’ husbands from financially extorting their wives. According to the Property Relations Law (1973) currently in effect in Israel, property division rulings can only take place once a divorce has officially been granted, unless otherwise decreed by the Family Court. This law has thus given ‘divorce- refusing’ husbands the opportunity to extort their wives financially, forcing them to cave in on property matters in return for an official divorce (which, by Jewish law, necessitates the husband’s consent). The new bill, proposed by Knesset Mem...

WOMEN REFUSE? Why do I have a feeling this is a skewed poll. Only 69 aguhnot? What about the ones who are silenced? Hushed up, shamed or verbally, emotionally, financially and or physical threatened? Sorry - my b.s. radar is going off on this one. Poll: More women refuse divorce than men Rabbinical Court combats claims that thousands of Jewish women are refused divorce; poll reveals there are only 69 agunot currently living in Israel Neta Sela More Jewish women refuse to give divorce then men, a poll released by the rabbinical courts' management titled: "Why is the couple not yet divorced?" revealed on Tuesday. According to the poll, there are 190 Jewish men refused divorce in Israel, which make up 20 percent of the open divorce files; as opposed to 180 women who are refused divorce, and constitute 19 percent of the open files. There are currently 942 open divorce files in Israel's rabbinical courts, and the survey was conducted among a sample of 346 of these files, ...

'WHIPS', 'CHAINS' and AGUNOT Josh over at ParshaBlog has a great post today about agunahs; commenting on an article in today's Wall Street Journal . I carried the article in full over on my abuse victims & survivors blog. Sultan Knish gave a wonderful comment and I hope you all take a minute to go check it out as well as read the whole article. I am grateful to him for his post . While I am not technically an agunah there are aspects of my agreement with my childrens' father that keep me "chained" and which he exploits and 'beats me over the head' (figuratively) with. I endure for the well-being of my children. I consider my comfort of little consequence when it comes to my children. Besides I am the adult. But, I do have empathy for these women. Making an Orthodox woman an agunah is, in my opinion, a blatantly disrespectful form of misogyny and yes, ABUSE. AGUNAH INTERNATIONAL has this to say about the agunah problem: It is tim...

EVEN PAULA ZAHN Seems Paula Zahn and I were married to the "same guy." I haven't talked much about my marriage for the sake of my children but I will talk about it a bit more soon, in as polite as possible terms. Constructive abandonment is a horrible thing. Especially when the spouse doing it won't let go. You are basically trapped. An agunah. Mine wouldn't. And the abuse along with my disability was enough to made me suicidal. About 5 years into the abandonment I fell into an inappropriate relationship . Even though my husband and I were sharing a home (like Paula and her husband) we were not sharing a bed and hadn't for years. I called the couch my bed - which did wonders for my atypical M.S. (not) My ex tried to sue the individual I had the emotional affair with for " procurement ." He'd hacked my computer back when I didn't know much about internet privacy. I blocked that suit once. My ex has tried to hurt and embarass me li...

OH MY GOODNESS!! STOP THE INSANITY!! THEY'RE DATING!?!? (cringe) Pardon while I hurl!! I really feel bad for the exes and the children. I wonder if Amy's parents are still around for this naseau-fest. I believe in reparative justice but didn't that girl shoot his wife? And wasn't he sleeping with her? Denying it? and then did time for sex with a minor? WHAT MESSAGE IS THIS SENDING? Joey Buttafuoco and his Long Island Lolita, Amy Fisher, reloaded their relationship last night on their first date in 15 years. Their big night out in Port Jefferson, L.I., was caught on tape, which will air on tonight's edition of "The Insider." A torrid affair between the auto mechanic and his underage lover dampened in 1992 when Fisher shot Buttafuoco's then-wife, Mary Jo, in the head, but recent circumstances made Joey's heart grow fonder for Fisher, she told the TV show. "We started talking when Joey was in jail," she said. Buttafuoco, 53, recently ende...