Posts

Showing posts with the label listening

Characteristics of a Good Mother

Image
by Teresa McEntire There are many mothers in the world, both good and bad. I have seen mothers that I wish that I could be more like and those that I think should never have had children in the first place. But what exactly makes a woman a good mother? Anthropologist Margaret Mead has spent years studying children, parents, and the methods used by mothers raising children all over the world. When asked what she considered the most "valuable capacities for a mother to have." She replied by giving five qualities that she feels every good mother must possess. 1. Treats each child as an individual. A good mother realizes that every child is not the same. She understands that children are not just an extension of or born to be a helper for their parent, but that each child is an "individual in their own right." 2. A good mother helps their child set out on their own path . Allowing the child to follow that path, regardless of the mother's desires. Yet at...

Loshan Hara or The Right Thing to Do?

Image
Speaking out about the wrongdoings of people who abuse others, politicians and about my government has earned me some accusations of performing LASHON HARA . A wonderful commentary from Radical Torah however, throws it into a whole new light for me: (excerpts) Well, who do I know who loves rebuke? Let’s see. There’s — no, well, how about — no. Hmm. I think , didn’t — …uh, nope, not her either. Maybe..? No, nope. Well, I can’t really think of anyone I know who loves rebuke. But rebuking, that’s another story. I’m sure we can all think of lots of folks who are pretty into it. They swoop into your office on an already unpleasant Monday to let you know about some trivial thing that no one but them noticed. Or they call you up and sweetly tell you they told you so. Or — Hey, Mom, do I have to hear about that again? But surely, that’s not what the Torah is speaking of when it tells us this week, Leviticus 19:17: You shall not hate your brother in your heart; you shall surely rebuke...

Infliction of Hurt, Guilt and Threats

Image
A couple of gems from Kathy Krajc o (with some equal opportunity graphics for you as well): "Responsibility" Wrap: Narcissist Hurts You to Make YOU Guilty of the Sin of Feeling the Pain by Kathy Krajco Remember when you were a child and you used to say that "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"? Even little children instinctively know enough to hide their pain when someone has hurt their feelings. This instinct is good, even when the enemy isn't really an enemy - just a friendly opponent in a tennis match. Don't let the emotional effect on you of bad things show. It encourages the adversary. But keeping them to yourself doesn't get rid of those feelings, does it? Children, however, live in very different minds than normal adults do. Like Alice and Peter Pan, they don't distinguish between fantasy and realty, preferring fantasy, where they learn the (delusory) power of magical thinking. In some cases this pretending goe...