BARBARA'S TCHATZKAHS

And so, what do you do if you cannot forgive your abuser? What SHOULD you do? Which party is the obstacle to reconciliation here? You or your abuser? What should you do? Just accept it. It's a fact. You cannot really change it: all you can do is delude yourself about it. You can pretend to have "forgiven" your abuser all you want, but there is nonetheless, a state of war between you. It exists whether you admit it or not. This is because your abuser owes you something he or she refuses to pay. The narcissist refuses to even admit what they DID yesterday. He may have punched you for 20 minutes straight, but today he denies that it happened, accusing you of "making things up" or of you being the one who attacked. Since he won't even admit what he did, he is also denying you acknowledgement that it was wrong. That he has wronged you. So, what is there to "forgive," pray tell? He is also denying you a promise and guarantees to stop it. So, how can you ...

It was eight years ago, and it was yesterday, and it is today, and it will be tomorrow. The planet has turned once more on the sky-blue day of horror, the day everything changed. So we stop in recognition of that which we remember quietly every day, that which we will go on remembering. For remembering is our forever unfinished business. First, there are the people. Mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, family and friends. And many strangers with whom we are bonded, whose names ring in love and fury, whose names make the printed page a field of tombstones. They are murder victims, almost 3,000 strong, killed by 19 foot soldiers of evil, dispatched by fanatics who burned with the desire to attack America. And burn to come again. Our business in that regard, too, is unfinished. That Osama Bin Laden remains at large is an affront. We take comfort in faith that he will get his. So, also, we can only await the end of his Al Qaeda henchmen imprisoned at Guantanamo, most notab...

Update: SEIU gets phone call “threatening to teach union officials a thing or two about ‘the Second Amendment’” Brian Beutler reported at Talking Points Memo on Friday that a health care protester in New Mexico had been encouraging those following him on Twitter to bring their guns to town hall meetings — and use them if provoked. “If ACORN/SEIU attends these meetings for disruptive purposes, and you have a license to carry….carry,” Scott Oskay wrote in one tweet. In another, he suggested, “Stop being peaceful, and hurt them. Badly.” The Service Employees Industrial Union (SEIU) appears to be the latest bogeyman for the anti-health care protesters. Conservative blogger Michelle Malkin, for example, claimed on Friday that “SEIU thugs rolled up their sleeves and attacked a black conservative protester in St. Louis.” As described by the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, however, the facts of the incident cited by Malkin were far less clearcut. Out of the half a dozen people arrested following a to...

by Jonny Paul The number of anti-Semitic hate crimes against the Jewish community in Britain reached an unprecedented high in the first half of 2009, according to figures released on Thursday by a Jewish community organization. The Community Security Trust (CST), a charity which monitors anti-Semitism and provides security for the Jewish community in Britain, recorded 609 anti-Semitic incidents across the UK from January to June this year, over double the 276 incidents recorded for the same period last year. The charity said that this is the worst year since 1984, when records began, and that the number of incidents in the first half of this year is higher than the 598 incidents recorded in all of 2006, during the Second Lebanon War, and the 544 in all of 2008. The charity records incidents reported by members of the Jewish community, organizations and witnesses of crimes and incidents. A further 236 incidents were reported to CST during this period but not included in the report, due ...

by Yakov Horowitz On Sunday, Elhanan Buzaglo was sentenced to four years imprisonment for the vicious beating of a woman nine months ago in Jerusalem's Ma'alot Dafna neighborhood. Buzaglo, a member of a haredi mishmar hazniyut, a self-appointed modesty squad, pleaded guilty as part of a plea bargain struck with the State Attorney's Office. Buzaglo, who broke into the 31-year-old divorcé's apartment along with four other men, was convicted of receiving $2,000 from the mishmar hazniyut for his role in the attack, which was intended to intimidate her into leaving the predominantly haredi neighborhood. Judge Noam Solberg wrote in his decision that "the punishment must reflect the abhorrence of his acts... and deter him and others like him." Even though the Jerusalem District Court described the assailants as an "armed militia," Buzaglo, 29, was the only defendant to be convicted in this barbaric attack. According to newspaper reports last October, a ser...

So many other bloggers are doing a much, much better job of covering the current Middle East situation better than me. But suffice it to say I am sick sick sick of hearing what "horrible" people the Israelis are for PROTECTING THEMSELVES, AND THEIR PEOPLE - and for taking DECISIVE ACTION against terrorists who WANT THEM DEAD. Answer the clue phone, media. You're being used. Again. FROM THE AEGEAN STABLES: Whether by Israeli accident or Hamas engineering, expect a spectacular civilian massacre in the coming days, followed by an orgy of Pallywood photography, amplified by a compliant Western media, and even greater fury in the streets of the Muslim and Western world. It’s in the Hamas playbook… and will be until the media gets sober. Here’s the background, and the obscenity that will probably be played. Barry Rubin has laid out the various endgames open to Hamas, and how, when all else fails, it’s the media reserves you draw on to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. ...

Has ANYONE in the Diplomatic Core realized THAT TERRORISTS DON'T LISTEN? The U.S. on Saturday blamed the militant group Hamas for breaking a cease-fire and attacking Israel, which retaliated with strikes of its own during what became the single bloodiest day of fighting in years. The White House called for the cease-fire to be restored, yet there were few indications that the violence, which has left more than 200 people dead and nearly another 400 wounded, was waning. Israeli Defense Minister Ehud Barak warned that the operation in Gaza would widen if necessary. It was "completely unacceptable" for Hamas, which controls Gaza, to launch attacks on Israel after a truce lasting several months, said Gordon Johndroe, a spokesman for the National Security Council. "These people are nothing but thugs, so Israel is going to defend its people against terrorists like Hamas that indiscriminately kill their own people," Johndroe said in Texas as President George W. Bush w...

by Phil Mushnick The news media always seems to lose their nerve with the wrong people at the worst times. The news media almost always grows politely silent when it's time to be firm and inquisitive. Thus, thus the follow-up questions that audiences are eager to have answered are never even asked. The recent terrorist bombings that left 200 murdered and 300 injured in Mumbai inspired the usual shock and outrage. And the same, boilerplate responses from Muslim spokesmen here, there and everywhere: "This is not what Islam teaches" and/or "These are not real Muslims; Islam teaches respect for life." For example, an organization known as Muslim Matters, responded with: "As Muslims, we condemn such senseless carnage against innocent civilians, wherever it may occur. This goes against the fundamental spirit of Islam, which promotes a culture of life and humanity, not bloodshed and violence. And another example of why extremist ideology, whatever that ideology m...

All acts of terrorism shock, as is their intention, but there was something about the attacks on Mumbai that was particularly chilling. To suicide bombers, or to those who flew planes into crowded buildings in New York and Washington on 9/11, their victims were anonymous and faceless, though that did not make their crimes any less heinous. The Mumbai gunmen looked their victims in the eye before killing them with automatic weapons. They mowed down the innocent and the defenceless with a callousness that was inhuman. They sought out westerners but also killed many more ordinary Indians, such as those rushing to catch a commuter train home at Mumbai’s main railway station. It is hard to think of a cause, either inside or outside India, that could justify such cold-blooded brutality, or to put yourself inside the twisted minds of those who could imagine that such extreme cowardice was in any way heroic. One victim, who miraculously survived, was first shot and then had his throat cut. Mos...

from Sugar & Spice I was reading an article in the newspaper today about the trial of the Missouri woman accused of contributing to the suicide of a 13 year old girl after she and her daughter and an assistant tormented the girl over a period of time . I thought to myself, "damn, it's a good thing I'm not a depressed 13 year old girl, or some folks who visit my blog would find themselves on the wrong side of the law," because the things that have been uttered here at this blog and others to folks who refuse to get in line behind the Obama pied piper parade are pretty amazing and not in a good way. This MySpace suicide case has been in the news a lot over the past week with the trial going on and I've been keeping track of it if for no other reason than everytime I open the newspaper each day, there's an update. Earlier, I decided to do a Google search to see if I could find a definition of sorts about the Federal description of Cyber Bullying, when I foun...

You can run, but you can’t hide. —Joe Louis by Roger Melton, M.A., L.M.F.T., CEAP (Retired) The Key to Counter-Control If you possess a strong sense of responsibility, Controllers will use it against you. Understanding how to prevent a Controller from manipulating your conscience is key in learning how to "counter - control." Moral integrity is one of the finest assets a person can possess, but it can attract a Controller the way a "hot target" attracts a cruise missile. When dealing with a Controller, conscientiousness can be your Achilles’ Heel. Integrity and conscientiousness remind Controllers of their most profound character flaw. They hate being reminded of what they do not have. They hate those qualities in others because Controllers cannot possess them. That is one reason that they are attracted to integrity. But their attraction is rooted in a desire to dominate or destroy. They must manipulate, rule or emotionally and psychologically annihilate anyone whos...

Unbelievable! The smearing and slamming of Sarah Palin is already boggling my mind. I remember a professor of mine in college talking about the inner process of acting with me. We were sitting in his office and the conversation was getting very esoteric and interesting to me. At one point in our chat he leaned forward and said, "be careful what you hate and fear; because there's an inherent danger in BECOMING that thing as you try to fight it." I didn't understand what he meant at the time but I remembered and as the years wore on he's been proved right over & over again. The Dems and Far Left as now JUST AS BAD AS THE ACCUSED THE FAR RIGHT OF BEING IN 2000 AND 2004!! Today alone I heard that: Sarah Palin isn't a good mother to her infant, special needs child - because she's running for Vice President! (Would they say that to a man?) Sarah Palin was a knee-jerk choice on McCain's part because the RNC vetoed Joe Lieberman. (say what??) Sarah Pa...