BARBARA'S TCHATZKAHS

by Steven Stosn y The proliferation of blogs and emails may be partially responsible for the increase in anger of recent years. We can learn a lot about the emotions that motivate many blogs and emails, as well as reactions to them, from, believe it or not, a few observations of animals. Anger, for instance, is the fight part of the primitive fight/flight/freeze response common to all mammals. It functions primarily to protect self and juvenile offspring from harm. Activation of the fight/flight/freeze response requires a dual perception of threat and vulnerability. Animals respond to lesser threats with greater anger, fear, or submission (freeze) when they are wounded, starving, sick, or recently traumatized. The activation of fight over flight/freeze is determined by the annihilation potential of the threat. A raccoon will ferociously fight a rat to defend her newborn pups but not a cougar. Thus more anger is observed in powerful animals, which tend to be predatory. Powerful animals...

Iddybud sent me this video from her friend, Tom Watson. It's powerful and a MUST SEE: Says it all: a WOMAN is still scarier to our society than an Islamofascist sympathizer who lies as casually as he breathes. Yes - WOMEN are still the underclass. WOMEN are still to be maligned, stepped on, hated and brutalized - physically, emotionally & verbally. WOMEN are objects. WOMEN are nothing. I am DISGUSTED. This election has taught me things about my fellow Americans that I suspected but now can not ignore. Vile. Watch this video and pass it on! If you are on an aggregator - CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEO.

Ms. Lefave has a great blog - you can read it here . In her post below, she gives a great view of the difference between privacy & secrecy. Secrecy is NOT Confidentiality, in my view. Secrecy is what you are asked to keep to protect a lie, a cheater, fraud, a con, or the blatant exploitation of something or someone. I learned the hard way - secrecy is not healthy - it is highly TOXIC to the spirit of someone who keeps it. It has strings and conditions. My children tell me their secrets all the time. As their mother and someone who loves them without strings or conditions I keep their secrets. I feel this is CONFIDENTIALITY. In my heart and mind its my ethical and God-given duty to be good to my word with my children and earn the love & respect they consistently show me. The same holds true for doctors, healthcare professionals, clergy and hopefully, lawyers. They all have some sort of moral and ethical duty to their clients, patients, etc. I also hold this same stan...

WHO'S SORRY NOW? I am a big believer in sincere apologies. Not the "I'm sorry" and then making yourself scarce so you never have to interact with the other person again. No, I mean RESTORATIVE JUSTICE . I've seen it in my anti DV-work. Abusers who make have done physical or emotional harm to a victim, looking them up after jail time or an 18 month batterer program and apologizing. Not asking them to get back together but forging a friendship with them. Even apologizing to their family. I have seen a couple enter into Bible study together. Sometimes one or both has a new relationship but they make something new out of it. And this forgiveness and restoration of peace & friendship has a ripple effect on everyone and everything around them. It's tough but its truly beautiful. Judaism says you have to try to apologize sincerely three times. I will do 1,000 when I know I am in the wrong. And of course there's Teshuva as well. However, I am SIC...

Any of this sound like people running a country near you??? The Power Patterns: Sharks, Impactors, Controllers, Dominators The Impactor The Impactor primarily wants to know that they have the ability to affect you in some way. They need to influence their environment, have an impact. Their greatest fear is that they are invisible and powerless. The impact doesn't have to be positive. In fact, they will most often resort to negative impact because the result is so much greater. If you do something good, you might get a few words of praise, a smile, or a hug, all of which are usually over in a minute or two. If you do something bad, the impact could last days! Just visit some of the forums and watch the impactors at work, creating pages and pages of responses with just one flaming message. What an impact they are having! And then you'll usually see them sitting calmly in the middle of the storm they've created. If they can make you lose control, they're ecstatic. The wors...