Standing By Your Sex-Hobbyist -Man; Because It's Your Fault Too?

BLOG AGAINST SEXUAL VIOLENCE
APRIL 5, 2007

SEXUAL VIOLENCE &
POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER

I consider myself a survivor of sexual violence from a number of incidences in my life. My doctors and therapists do too. At times the sexual violence was emotional or psychological in nature - but it has powerfully affected my views of myself as a woman and as a person. It shredded myself esteem. It is something I struggle with now, every single day of my life.

As the mother of daughters I hope I can teach them to love themselves enough and know that my love for them is unconditional, so they do not fall prey to the traps set by those who use & exploit women.

PTSD and Relationships:
Trauma survivors with PTSD often experience problems in their intimate and family relationships or close friendships. PTSD involves symptoms that interfere with trust, emotional closeness, communication, responsible assertiveness, and effective problem solving:

Loss of interest in social or sexual activities, and feeling distant from others, as well as feeling emotionally numb. Partners, friends, or family members may feel hurt, alienated, or discouraged, and then become angry or distant toward the survivor.

Feeling irritable, on-guard, easily startled, worried, or anxious may lead survivors to be unable to relax, socialize, or be intimate without being tense or demanding. Significant others may feel pressured, tense, and controlled as a result.

Difficulty falling or staying asleep and severe nightmares prevent both the survivor and partner from sleeping restfully, and may make sleeping together difficult.

Trauma memories, trauma reminders or flashbacks, and the attempt to avoid such memories or reminders, can make living with a survivor feel like living in a war zone or living in constant threat of vague but terrible danger. Living with an individual who has PTSD does not automatically cause PTSD; but it can produce "vicarious" or "secondary" traumatization, which is almost like having PTSD.

Reliving trauma memories, avoiding trauma reminders, and struggling with fear and anger greatly interferes with survivors' abilities to concentrate, listen carefully, and make cooperative decisions -- so problems often go unresolved for a long time. Significant others may come to feel that dialogue and teamwork are impossible.

Survivors of childhood sexual and physical abuse, rape, domestic violence, combat, or terrorism, genocide, torture, kidnapping or being a prisoner of war, often report feeling a lasting sense of terror, horror, vulnerability and betrayal that interferes with relationships:

Feeling close, trusting, and emotionally or sexually intimate may seem a dangerous "letting down of my guard" because of past traumas -- although the survivor often actually feels a strong bond of love or friendship in current healthy relationships.

In the first weeks and months following the traumatic event, survivors of disasters, terrible accidents or illnesses, or community violence often feel an unexpected sense of anger, detachment, or anxiety in intimate, family, and friendship relationships. Most are able to resume their prior level of intimacy and involvement in relationships, but the 5-10% who develop PTSD often experience lasting problems with relatedness and intimacy.

Successful intimate relationships require:

Creating a personal support network to cope with PTSD while maintaining or rebuilding family and friend relationships with dedication, perseverance, hard work, and commitment

Sharing feelings honestly and openly with an attitude of respect and compassion

Continual practice to strengthen cooperative problem-solving and communication

Infusions of playfulness, spontaneity, relaxation, and mutual enjoyment.

For many trauma survivors, intimate, family, and friend relationships are extremely beneficial, providing companionship and belongingness as an antidote to isolation, self-esteem as an antidote to depression and guilt, opportunities to make a positive contribution to reduce feelings of failure or alienation, and practical and emotional support when coping with life stressors.

As with all psychological disturbances, especially those that impair social, psychological or emotional functioning, it is best to seek treatment from a professional who has expertise in both treating couples or family issues and PTSD.

The information above is presented for educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for informed medical advice or training. Do not use this information to diagnose or treat a mental health problem without consulting a qualified health or mental health care provider. All information contained in this section of text is in the public domain, and may be copied and distributed without restriction.
Original Source

Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) is observed in April and is the month dedicated to making a concerted effort to prevent and raise awareness of sexual violence and its prevention through special events, although such activities may occur at any time throughout the year. Recognizing Sexual Assault Awareness Month each year highlights sexual violence as a major public health problem and reinforces the need for prevention efforts.

The purpose of Sexual Assault Awareness Month is to increase the public's understanding about sexual violence in our society. This effort can help communities support rape and sexual assault survivors, victims, and their families, as well as the individuals and agencies that provide rape crisis intervention and prevention services throughout the year. It is also a time to encourage the public to take steps to address sexual violence. The hope is that a month of intensified awareness efforts combined with the broad spectrum of sexual violence prevention work throughout the year will bring us closer to ending sexual assault.

The 2007 SAAM campaign national slogan is: Prevent Sexual Violence…in our communities. This focus helps communities recognize that everyone is responsible for preventing sexual violence and that it requires all of us working together in creative ways.


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